The Commissioner of Putting In Manholes, that's who.
Even the lawns aren't safe...
(For the record, I was going to be more gender-neutral, but "The Commissioner of Putting In Sewer-Access Portals" wasn't nearly as funny.)
IN OTHER NEWS:
Literally 'in other news,' for once. I captured this headline and lead photo from a story on the ChinaDaily.cn web site. In case you can't read the headline, it says:
"Beijing tries to dispel rain for Olympic opening ceremony"
"You feelin' lucky, humidity?"